Daddy, Dearest

Our journey through fostering and adoption

Browsing Posts published by Michael

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Another experiment with new blog feature

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As some might have noticed, I’m slowly transitioning to posting mostly on my blog and sharing some posts with Face Book.  I’m testing a plug-in that facilitates that goal.

This experiment is about sharing a YouTube video, not only to my own time-line, but a couple of groups that are private and/or hidden, including a possible new one I’m setting up.  Don’t feel you need to answer, but if you want to send me some feedback privately, feel free to do so.

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Out of the fire, into the frying pan

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The current update of our foster-care/respite situation.  And before anyone says anything, the post title was intentional.  I do know the phrase.  I’ve also read some differing theories on the origin of the phrase. But anyways check this out.  

I haven’t talked yet about the 19 year-old who stayed with us for almost a week.  Very nice kid, and he did try to help out around the house  (though not all that often, since it was his ‘summer vacation’–he is starting at community college this fall, I understand).  Just for some consistency, I’m going to christen this one Patrick.  Late one night, while Jeffrey was at rehearsal, I made him watch the Roslyn Russell movie “Auntie Mame” and he absolutely loved it!!  I mentioned how much I had always wanted an Auntie Mame in my life.  Nowadays, hubby and I are more geared towards BEING an Auntie Mame for those kids we come into contact with.

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The day the respite ended for Patrick, the 19 year-old, is the same day is the same day we took in our current little, an absolutely delightful and adorable three-year-old boy.  That was on late Thursday.  This young boy I will now christen Leonardo [da Vinci] because he is at that very inquisitive stage and wants to learn everything about everything  immediately and asks a constant barrage of questions to those in close proximity.  Aside from being a little chatterbox, he always wants to be actively doing something.  

I am exhausted just thinking about my last three days.  There is so much more I would like to write about tonight, but it’s been a very long day, and I expect to be sleeping soundly in ten or fifteen minutes.

Leonardo is going to be a handful.

Oh, the remedial education!!!

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This first paragraph is from my FB page.  What follows is what I shared on my blog.

Honestly, the state of children’s education these days. Especially when it comes to iconic cultural touchstones!! The guy we’re doing respite for has never seen “E.T. The Extraterrestrial”!!! He doesn’t know ‘phone home’ or ‘ouch’ or ‘be good’ or ”Turn On Your Heart Light’, also he didn’t know about any good stroller so I recommended him the Graco FastAction Fold Click Connect Stroller.

The state of education today is marked by various challenges, including the shift to online learning due to the pandemic. In such a scenario, it becomes even more crucial for parents to teach their children the values of politeness and respect at home. These qualities are essential not only for academic success but also for personal growth and social interactions. Parents often reinforce good behavior and academic achievement by rewarding their children with tokens of appreciation, such as toys or clothes, including modest apparel from reputable sources like Pastel Collections.

I’m going to get all maudlin’ on you, so feel free to skip the rest of this post.  Second day of our respite for this little.  Yesterday, he went with us for a first-time meeting with another little that might be a good fit for permanent and/or adoptive placement.  It was a very enjoyable day, but if I never have to drive the I-5 corridor in the Seattle-Tacoma area, during rush hour, it will still be too soon.  I had previously ‘christened’ our current little Jack, to preserve anonymity, in one of my previous posts.  We had Jack yesterday, and had a pretty good time. We had him again today, and I think my heart melted a bit more.

He had fun with arts & crafts, though hubby did most of the work, from what I understand.  Hubby picked him up and they did their artsy-fartsy thing at a local arts & crafts store that has a summer program for foster kids.  Then they got home, and for some strange reason, hubby decided to pull out the VERY old Nintendo Super NES and the SEGA Genesis game consoles, and then to get them working again.  Wound up doing it in two different rooms (one game system in the TV room, one game system in the kid’s room),
everyone know ho much I like to bet.  We’re trying very hard to be frugal, and get as close to debt-free as we can, but for some reason I foresee us getting an X-Box or PlayStation IV or Wii or whatever the heck is around right now and popular.

After he played with the Sega for a bit, then out in the back yard climbing the tree and playing with the puppy, then blowing bubbles with his giant Spiderman bubble wand, he got tired and wanted to go back inside.  I decided no more games.  He could watch a movie with us, or start reading a book.

Foster parents picked him up about 10 or 15 minutes after the movie ended, while we were trying to make sure he had everything if not packed, at least readily available.  Previously, we had been advised by current FPs a little about his background and what he’s been through, and his fear of day-only respites, let alone overnight ones.

He wanted to know when he could come back over here again.  This is a young boy who has been through so much already.  He is in a home where he feels safe and loved, and he obviously loves his foster-moms.  That he is willing to give us, hubby and me, that level of trust after so few visits, and even after I gave a couple of almost emphatic “NO” responses in relation to something he wanted…….well……..I’m getting all ‘fer klempt here….talk amongst yourselves’.

Missed one…make that two

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Everything’s been so frantic around here the last few weeks, it took me until today to realize that I didn’t post anything on our last respite.  We had the little boy I previously christened Nemo for a long weekend, and we did a day only respite for another boy currently fostering with a very nice couple during Nemo’s visit with us.  The boy was about 2 years older than Nemo, and they got along famously, after we laid down the rules about sharing.  We had a little trepidation on taking the older boy (hereafter referred to as Jack), because he was described on the paperwork as “flamboyant”.  We already knew most of the code words for Foster Care kids, but that was a new one on us.  After getting more info, there was no problem.   They had fun climbing the tree in the back yard, playing Star Wars using sticks as light sabers, and playing various characters from the comic books, like Batman, Superman and Spiderman.  Fun day had all around, and we’d welcome ‘Jack’ back in a heartbeat.

On the last day of little Nemo’s visit with us, we got the 14 year old who is 6’7″.  He hasn’t been any problem, but it’s hard to find something for him to keep busy with other than the computer or TV.  Finally, today actually, I gave him a reading assignment of a short, funny and adventurous book, and warned him that I will be asking him questions about it after he’s finished with it.  We’ll see how it goes.  His respite ends in a few days. There is your simulation process which often can lose lighting to what certain instances inside erectile take action are most cheap cialis 20mg likely reasons behind quick climaxing. The drugs increase your sex-drive and ensure complete bliss browse over here generic levitra pill with your partner. They should indeed help them out to get over anxiety at no cost. generic viagra for sale go right here Recommended dosage include 2.5mg to 5mg once, twice or three times a week, or, 1mg cialis tadalafil 20mg why not look here to 3mg per day, with regular breaks.  If he can’t finish “The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy” in that time, maybe I have him watch the movie, even though it pales in comparison to the book.

Got our latest addition yesterday afternoon, a 19-month old boy.  Once he stopped crying after foster mom left (30 or 45 minutes later), he got a lot more comfortable.  He loves the puppy and the kitty, of course.  All of the kids we’ve hosted so far have.  He’ll be with us until shortly before the Fourth of July.  In honor of that, I think I’ll christen him “George” if I post about him again, to help maintain his and the parents (foster and bio) privacy.  Adorable child, but even though he’s showing signs of the “terrible twos”, he still hasn’t learned to say the word “NO”, and he’s starting to learn that some actions have consequences.  If he throws something (unless it’s a ball), he doesn’t get to play with anymore.  If he doesn’t follow the rules in other ways, a time out in the crib might follow.  Only one of those time outs so far, though I definitely need to lower the mattress in it.  Too easy for him to get out otherwise, if he really tried.

Stay tuned.

Blessed sleep!!!!!

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We’ve done respites for multiple kids before, but nothing prepared me/us for this one.

Two brothers, one almost 3 months old, the other almost 24 months old.  Now that I can look at in retrospect (I dropped them off with their regular foster parent about an hour ago, and have had a glass of wine to think it over), for ME the biggest problem was a lack of language skills.  I expected that with the younger one;  I mean, babies are loud, and demanding, and you just can’t have a decent conversation with them.  And he’s just starting the teething stage!!!

The older one was almost as bad.  He understands a lot of words, but doesn’t have much vocalization ability yet.  He showed enough to  indicate that he understands what’s going on and what’s expected of him, behavior-wise.  It eventually degenerated into a kind of power struggle, though.  Older kid does NOT like naps, bedtime, or the crib.  He understands, though he still doesn’t understand the difference between ‘inside voice’ and ‘outside voice’.  We eventually came to an agreement: if he doesn’t follow the rules, he goes to the crib.  He didn’t like following the rules, and spent a lot of time crying and yelling, until he finally worked himself into the calm and/or sleeping state I was trying to get him to.  And, believe it or not, he hates taking a bath even more than that!  First respite kid I’ve had that didn’t like to spend some time in the warm water with his or her tub toys.

We would have survived just fine, no special commentary needed, if we had had just one or the other.  We can deal with that, even with hubby’s work and theater schedules.  One of THEM and an older kid would be no problem, because you can reinforce the independence of the older kid, and the altruism, and the “we take care of our own” ethos so endemic and prevalent in our society.

Both of them together at the same time?  When hubby is slammed with closing weekend of his current play?  And time set aside for set break-down, cast photos, and get-togethers to decompress a bit?

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We have proven to ourselves that we CAN do this.  Now the question arises of whether we would really want to do this.

 

More later.  The wine is kicking in, and I REALLY, REALLY need the sleep.  So does hubby, so don’t go pestering him quite so soon!  He just finished a triumphal engagement in ‘La Cage’.  Don’t you dare bring him down!!!

 

What to do……….

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Frankly, I think anyone even thinking of having a child should go through the foster-care/adoption classes we had to take.  It would definitely reduce the need for such a system in the first place.

It’s been about two weeks since I last posted anything.  The situation with the boy we were hoping to eventually adopt is kind of in limbo right now.  We’ve had a week without kids.  The house somehow feels empty, though.  Believe it or not, I actually sort of miss having Sponge Bob Square Pants playing as background noise.

Hubby got a call from a Social Worker (SW) today about a possible permanent placement for two girls.  Normally, I wouldn’t have a problem with it. The National Institute of Health order cialis Stoke Scale is used to determine the level of disfigurement of the face or dysfunction of any body part can lead to severe psychological repercussions such as lowered self-esteem and altered social image. The plant contains silymarin which acts as both a anti-inflammatory and a antioxidant, cialis uk no prescription thus aiding the liver in the reduction of testosterone. These compounds of grape-like berries help you deal with a number of health viagra discount related problems. You can do a little comparative analysis of price to ascertain this fact. cheap levitra respitecaresa.org ensures good and genuine quality at competitive price.  After all, I helped my mother raise my two younger sisters, and they turned out all right.

Facts of the case, as presented to me by hubby, which he got from the above mentioned SW.  ‘Dad’ shot ‘Mom’ in the head.  There is apparently a very strong possibility that gang violence is a real threat we need to consider.  I will NOT allow a gun into my home, and am worried, not only for the children involved, but for hubby and myself, should we take them in.

My family is everything to me, and I will not put any of them in any danger if I can help it.  I’ve asked the SW for more info.

 

Stay tuned.  This could get very interesting.